Thoughts of life – Lebens Gedanken nr. 28

excerpts of my diary”

“auszüge aus meinem Tagebuch”

it is bizarre that the silence in a crowded room calms me morethan the noise in my room

I speak here sounds of thoughts

– – –

whispers and voices of my own insecurity

re-asserting itself after a long time of submission to my will

I believe the queen of my greatest enemy has a tight grip around my heart

her poison is chaning my perception of mundane views

normal gazes and voices not understood

– – –

where do you see the good

if not for losing all blood

 

the otherwise wastes

his time in your veins

 

 

Use it as ink

as the color of life

– – –

free to stay 

free to go

free to be 

all on my own

free to talk

free to think

free to live 

life 

to the

brink

– – –

the grief of loss

the other kind of frustration

Strangeness of openness

with own surprise

no more seconds

everything is deferred

life ends here

in the now

and begins again

without law

– – –

old scheme

 

like a disease

one of all mankind

easily fallen in to it 

and the deed of falsehood

no one asked for

was in the past

the old routine

– – –

es ist bizarr das die Stille in einem vollen Raum mich mehr beruhigtals den Lärm in meinem Zimmer

ich spreche hier von Gedanken Geräuschen

– – –

Flüstern und Stimmen meiner eigenen Unsicherheit

wieder behauptet sie sich nach einer langen Zeit der Unterwerfung unter meinen Willen

Ich glaube die Königin meiner größten Feindes hat einen festen Griff um mein Herz

ihr Gift verändert meine Wahrnehmung von weltlichen Ansichten

normalen Blicken und Stimmen nicht verstanden

– – –

wo siehst du das Gute

wenn nicht beim verlieren allen Blutes

das sonst verschwendet

seine Zeit in deinen

Andern spendet

nutze es als Tine

als Farbe des Lebens

– – –

frei bleiben

frei zu gehen

frei zu sein

ganz allein

frei zu sprechen

frei zu denken

frei zu leben

Leben

bis an den

Rand

– – –

die Trauer des Verlust

die andere Art des Frust

Seltsamkeit der Offenheit

mit eigenen Überraschung

keine weiteren Sekunden

alles wird gestundet

das Leben endet hier

im Jetzt

und beginnt von neuem

ohne Gesetz

– – –

Altes Schema

wie ne Krankheit

ein aller Menschheit

leicht reingeschlüpft

und die Falscheit der Tat

die niemand erbat

lag in der vergangenheit

die alte Routine

– – –

Home Town Snow Town

Lighttower III till 30/12/2012

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2 thoughts on “Thoughts of life – Lebens Gedanken nr. 28

  1. I do so enjoy reading the excerpts that you post from your diary. Beyond the fascination of being given permission to view something that is usually private, I am always delighted by the words I find in them. I regularly read these posts and find myself leaving again without comment. I thought I should correct this by letting you know that I come to view because I like the sound and structure of your words.

    Many times, I read them aloud because the sound of them is delightful: their noise and their echo seem to draw out images and senses. I find myself wanting to HEAR the words that you have written because something about them is heightened by the way that they lie on the air. There are so many moments to stop and enjoy e.g. “the queen of my greatest enemy”. What character and back story that conjures up!

    Today, I am enchanted by the 3rd piece. I like the boldness of its statement: something like a war-cry, an affirmation, and a commitment combined. And they called to mind the following words:
    And emblazon your crimson presence across your days; so that all would know of your passing.

    I am seriously impressed that you take the time to translate them; and thankful – as otherwise I wouldn’t be able to spend time playing with your words and taking in their pleasure.

    P.S.: I hope you don’t mind me mentioning this, but the correct tense for one of the lines is “I BELIEVE the queen of my greatest enemy has a tight grip around my heart”

    1. I do see visits from many countries in my stats, sometimes wondering what they were thinking about my writing or photography. So thank you for taking the time to comment and share your thoughts with me, I truly appreciate it.

      Concerning the grammar error, I never get annoyed if anyone points out a mistake in my writing. I had to learn to push the publish button knowing that it won’t be perfect 😉 .

      One of the biggest compliments is that my words inspired new words…

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